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Volkner’s phone buzzed next to him. He quickly checked the time. He hissed under his breath, and quickly checked the time. He was late.
Candice had called a meeting a few hours ago and hadn’t said why, only that she had a surprise announcement to make.
Quickly he turned to the computer at his desk and woke it up. He quickly opened his Online Chat app and jumped into the call.
“Yo Volkner! You’re late!”
“Yeah, I know, Flint. Sorry about that, I was working on some gym paperwork. How have you guys been?”
“Cooking with gas as usual!” said Flint. “Though I’ve had to wait for Candice’s big announcement because somebody was late!”
“Well, excuuuuse me, princess! Anyway, what have you got Candice?”
“I got my 500th complaint for not being a ‘real Ice Type Gym leader’ today!” said Candice excitedly.
“YEAAAAHHHH!” cheered Flint. “The Off Type Heroes strike again!”
Volkner just chuckled. “You did it!”
“I never thought this day would come!” said Candice. “I’m so excited!”
“Three cheers for old Chairman Burnstien,” said Flint.
“I know, right?” said Candice.
“Gotta toughen those kids up! What kinda challenger can’t take on a few surprises?” said Flint in a gruff voice, imitating Chairman Burnstien’s voice.
“Who did them in? Was it Octillery or Gyrados?”
“It was Toxacroak actually.”
“Ah, the good old Fighting, Poison and Ice type pokemon! Toxacroak everybody!” said Flint.
“I’m glad Toxacroak has been pulling through for you. After all, you need to have unexpected surprise pokemon when the expected surprise Pokemon on all of our teams are Gyrados and Octillery. Which obviously are known for their usage of electric type moves,” said Volkner.
“And are also known for their ice type moves!” said Candice.
“And who can forget their ability to learn fire type moves!” said Flint.
“Gyrados and Octillery people! The Fire, Electric and Ice type Water types!” said Candice.
“Could be any of them!” said Flint.
“Could be all of them!” said Volkner.
“But they’re definitely whatever type we say they are!” said Cadence. “Three cheers for TMs!”
The three quickly devolved into laughing hysterically. Volkner wiped a tear form his eye as he composed himself. Seriously, these guys. Choosing to go on his Pokemon adventure all those years ago with these two morons was one of the best decisions he’d ever made.
“Seriously though? I’m glad Chairman Burnstien lets us do our off-typing shenanigans,” said Flint.
“I mean, Cynthia doesn’t even specialize in a type,” said Candice. “But you’re right, I’m glad the Sinnoh League is more lax in that regard. If they weren’t, I couldn’t use Toxacroak or Gastrodon. Like sure, my aces are officially Abomasnow and Mamoswine, but man do those guys pull their weight. Like Gastrodon is a League Challenge run ender by himself. Everybody thinks they can just bring a fire or fighting type to take down my team. And if they did their research, they’ve got an electric type for Octillery and Gyrados. But man, nobody remembers Gastrodon!”
“I mean, Lickilicky and Ambipom fill the same roles for me. Even if Gyrados and Octillery are the ones who really makes life hard for ground types. Luxray and Raichu barely have to do anything sometimes!” said Volkner.
“Hah, you should see challenger’s faces when Snorlax or Stuntank hit the field,” said Flint. “They came expecting Rapidash and Infernape, but lemme tell ya, there’s a reason Lucian and I traded spots on the totem pole. It’s also the reason we decided to make the elite four challenge a two-day affair.”
“Oh, the whole fight the elite four on the first day and Cynthia on the second day thing?” asked Candice.
“So that Cynthia doesn’t have to show up for nothing all the time?” asked Volkner.
“Yup!” said Flint as he kicked his feet up on his desk. “Firewall Flint doesn’t burn out, baby!”
“I feel like we should get Candice a trophy,” said Volkner. “For taking the brunt of all of the haters.”
“Does it come with ice cream?” asked Candice.
“Ooh, Candice is asking the real questions here!” said Flint.
“Ice cream store gift card,” said Volkner. “I’m too lazy to scoop ice cream myself.”
“Pathetic,” said Candice with mock derision. “How much?”
“Eh, like 200 Poke. That should get you a medium sized thing, right?”
“Ice cream is not a thing, it is ART!” said Candice. “And anyway, stop cheaping out, I need some to share with my Pokemon too! They did just as much hard work!”
“Ooh buddy! This is gonna get expensive!” said Flint.
“Eh, I’ll just bill you for it, Mr. Rich Elite Four guy,” said Volkner.
“Hey! That’s my hard-earned dough from all the people you weren’t able to beat!”
Volkner rolled his eyes. “You wanna go, punk?”
“Oh, do I!” said Flint. “We still gotta break our tie!”
“987 to 987,” said Volkner. “I think its time I pulled ahead of you.”
“Bold words for an electric type gym leader with only 2 electric types!” said Flint.
“Big talk for a fire type specialist who can’t send his Gyrados or Octillery in against my ace,” said Volkner.
“You’re on buddy!” said Flint.
The two burst out laughing.
“But seriously, we need a tiebreaker,” said Flint.
“Which tiebreaker is this anyway?” asked Volkner.
“Like match 284,” said Flint.
Candice cleared her throat. “All right you two, enough with the grudge match! Stop getting off topic, what else am I getting with my trophy?”
“The bill,” said Volkner.
“Man, just because Chairman Burnstien is the reason we’re here doesn’t mean you gotta start sounding like him,” grumbled Candice.
“I dunno, maybe we’ll rustle up a present or two to go with the trophy, what do you think Flint?” said Volkner.
“Sure thing! Wait a second, stop trying to get me to spend all my money man!”
Volkner and Candice both chuckled at Flint.
“Urrrrg,” said Flint, stretching in his chair. “Fiiiine. I guess we’ll get you something.”
Candice smiled. “In all seriousness guys, thanks. I do appreciate it.”
“Of course! You’re one of us, Candice! We gotta celebrate this proper!” said Flint.
“It’s a monumental occasion in the history of the Off Type Heroes!” said Volkner. “You’re the first one of us to get to 500 complaints!”
“Of course, it is!” said Candice. “I’m making history over here!”
The trio all laughed at that.
“Well, I’ve got more gym paperwork to do. But I just had to tell you guys! And anyway, it was nice chatting! See you all on Friday!” said Candice.
“See you Friday!” said Flint with a two fingered salute.
“See you Friday,” said Volkner with a wave.
As the call ended, Volkner leaned back in his chair and took a deep breath. Those guys, man.
After a moment, he straightened his posture and opened up his internet browser. Now to find something Candice would like…..
Candice had called a meeting a few hours ago and hadn’t said why, only that she had a surprise announcement to make.
Quickly he turned to the computer at his desk and woke it up. He quickly opened his Online Chat app and jumped into the call.
“Yo Volkner! You’re late!”
“Yeah, I know, Flint. Sorry about that, I was working on some gym paperwork. How have you guys been?”
“Cooking with gas as usual!” said Flint. “Though I’ve had to wait for Candice’s big announcement because somebody was late!”
“Well, excuuuuse me, princess! Anyway, what have you got Candice?”
“I got my 500th complaint for not being a ‘real Ice Type Gym leader’ today!” said Candice excitedly.
“YEAAAAHHHH!” cheered Flint. “The Off Type Heroes strike again!”
Volkner just chuckled. “You did it!”
“I never thought this day would come!” said Candice. “I’m so excited!”
“Three cheers for old Chairman Burnstien,” said Flint.
“I know, right?” said Candice.
“Gotta toughen those kids up! What kinda challenger can’t take on a few surprises?” said Flint in a gruff voice, imitating Chairman Burnstien’s voice.
“Who did them in? Was it Octillery or Gyrados?”
“It was Toxacroak actually.”
“Ah, the good old Fighting, Poison and Ice type pokemon! Toxacroak everybody!” said Flint.
“I’m glad Toxacroak has been pulling through for you. After all, you need to have unexpected surprise pokemon when the expected surprise Pokemon on all of our teams are Gyrados and Octillery. Which obviously are known for their usage of electric type moves,” said Volkner.
“And are also known for their ice type moves!” said Candice.
“And who can forget their ability to learn fire type moves!” said Flint.
“Gyrados and Octillery people! The Fire, Electric and Ice type Water types!” said Candice.
“Could be any of them!” said Flint.
“Could be all of them!” said Volkner.
“But they’re definitely whatever type we say they are!” said Cadence. “Three cheers for TMs!”
The three quickly devolved into laughing hysterically. Volkner wiped a tear form his eye as he composed himself. Seriously, these guys. Choosing to go on his Pokemon adventure all those years ago with these two morons was one of the best decisions he’d ever made.
“Seriously though? I’m glad Chairman Burnstien lets us do our off-typing shenanigans,” said Flint.
“I mean, Cynthia doesn’t even specialize in a type,” said Candice. “But you’re right, I’m glad the Sinnoh League is more lax in that regard. If they weren’t, I couldn’t use Toxacroak or Gastrodon. Like sure, my aces are officially Abomasnow and Mamoswine, but man do those guys pull their weight. Like Gastrodon is a League Challenge run ender by himself. Everybody thinks they can just bring a fire or fighting type to take down my team. And if they did their research, they’ve got an electric type for Octillery and Gyrados. But man, nobody remembers Gastrodon!”
“I mean, Lickilicky and Ambipom fill the same roles for me. Even if Gyrados and Octillery are the ones who really makes life hard for ground types. Luxray and Raichu barely have to do anything sometimes!” said Volkner.
“Hah, you should see challenger’s faces when Snorlax or Stuntank hit the field,” said Flint. “They came expecting Rapidash and Infernape, but lemme tell ya, there’s a reason Lucian and I traded spots on the totem pole. It’s also the reason we decided to make the elite four challenge a two-day affair.”
“Oh, the whole fight the elite four on the first day and Cynthia on the second day thing?” asked Candice.
“So that Cynthia doesn’t have to show up for nothing all the time?” asked Volkner.
“Yup!” said Flint as he kicked his feet up on his desk. “Firewall Flint doesn’t burn out, baby!”
“I feel like we should get Candice a trophy,” said Volkner. “For taking the brunt of all of the haters.”
“Does it come with ice cream?” asked Candice.
“Ooh, Candice is asking the real questions here!” said Flint.
“Ice cream store gift card,” said Volkner. “I’m too lazy to scoop ice cream myself.”
“Pathetic,” said Candice with mock derision. “How much?”
“Eh, like 200 Poke. That should get you a medium sized thing, right?”
“Ice cream is not a thing, it is ART!” said Candice. “And anyway, stop cheaping out, I need some to share with my Pokemon too! They did just as much hard work!”
“Ooh buddy! This is gonna get expensive!” said Flint.
“Eh, I’ll just bill you for it, Mr. Rich Elite Four guy,” said Volkner.
“Hey! That’s my hard-earned dough from all the people you weren’t able to beat!”
Volkner rolled his eyes. “You wanna go, punk?”
“Oh, do I!” said Flint. “We still gotta break our tie!”
“987 to 987,” said Volkner. “I think its time I pulled ahead of you.”
“Bold words for an electric type gym leader with only 2 electric types!” said Flint.
“Big talk for a fire type specialist who can’t send his Gyrados or Octillery in against my ace,” said Volkner.
“You’re on buddy!” said Flint.
The two burst out laughing.
“But seriously, we need a tiebreaker,” said Flint.
“Which tiebreaker is this anyway?” asked Volkner.
“Like match 284,” said Flint.
Candice cleared her throat. “All right you two, enough with the grudge match! Stop getting off topic, what else am I getting with my trophy?”
“The bill,” said Volkner.
“Man, just because Chairman Burnstien is the reason we’re here doesn’t mean you gotta start sounding like him,” grumbled Candice.
“I dunno, maybe we’ll rustle up a present or two to go with the trophy, what do you think Flint?” said Volkner.
“Sure thing! Wait a second, stop trying to get me to spend all my money man!”
Volkner and Candice both chuckled at Flint.
“Urrrrg,” said Flint, stretching in his chair. “Fiiiine. I guess we’ll get you something.”
Candice smiled. “In all seriousness guys, thanks. I do appreciate it.”
“Of course! You’re one of us, Candice! We gotta celebrate this proper!” said Flint.
“It’s a monumental occasion in the history of the Off Type Heroes!” said Volkner. “You’re the first one of us to get to 500 complaints!”
“Of course, it is!” said Candice. “I’m making history over here!”
The trio all laughed at that.
“Well, I’ve got more gym paperwork to do. But I just had to tell you guys! And anyway, it was nice chatting! See you all on Friday!” said Candice.
“See you Friday!” said Flint with a two fingered salute.
“See you Friday,” said Volkner with a wave.
As the call ended, Volkner leaned back in his chair and took a deep breath. Those guys, man.
After a moment, he straightened his posture and opened up his internet browser. Now to find something Candice would like…..
